Light up my Sky
by LadyJacky
Summary: (I suck at those!) After the war, Harry finds himself in deep depression and thinks nobody will ever be able to help him out of this dark time, until he meets Draco again and has to admit, that the former Slytherin might have the impact on him he was waiting for so long. Will he finally be able to see the light in his life again?
1. Prologue

Hi :) Some people might still remember this story, because I had uploaded it before. I just decided recently to delete them all and re-write most of them, because I hope my writing has improved and I didn't like the way some of them turned out. Well, I hope you enjoy reading it!

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It was the 31st of October, everything was decorated for Halloween and children were already all dressed up and excited.

A young man walked through the streets, heading towards the graveyard as he did every year on that day. His raven black hair was unkempt, his black cloak pulled tightly around his body and his green eyes were scanning his surroundings. Some of the children stopped in amazement and looked at him, whispering excitedly as soon as they recognized who he was.

Suddenly a little boy came hurried towards him, a wand in one hand and a broomstick in the other, dressed in what looked like oversized Hogwarts school robes and with a lightening bolt drawn on his forehead.

"Look!" he pointed a finger to his fake scar and grinned hugely, "I am you!"

Smiling, the young man crouched down and patted the boy's shoulder, "Oh really? I never knew that I have a twin."

The boy's grin only became wider and he nodded eagerly, "Well, now you do, right?"

"Yes."

A young girl walked over to them, rolling her eyes at the boy.

"Come on Tom, we have to go or we won't get any sweets!" she pulled at the boy's arm and then looked up at the young man, suddenly blushing when curious, green eyes looked back at her.

"You remind me of a very dear friend of mine."

He couldn't hide his amusement about the fact that this little girl just looked a lot like Hermione Granger when he had first met her.

"Really?" she giggled and blushed a bit more, "I wouldn't have thought that somebody would recognize who I am."

He smiled and straightened up again, "How should I not recognize my best friend?"

Both of the kids started to giggle and then turned around to join their friends again.

He watched them go and ran a hand through his hair, ruffling it even more.

"You should be glad that you're not me..." he muttered to himself and continued his way.

...

He wasn't sure how long he'd stood there, just staring down at the tombstone. He wasn't sure either why he kept coming back over and over again. It was always just hurting him.

_Although... _he thought bitterly, _everything's just hurting me these days._

A sigh left his lips and he turned around, glancing up at the nightsky. It was clouded and he wasn't able to see a single star. He had the odd impression that the sky was mirroring his feelings.

"Harry?" Hermione's familiar voice broke through the silence and Harry looked down. She smiled, but her eyes reflected all the worry he caused her. Slowly, she reached out towards him in a silent invitation to join her and he took her hand when he reached her.

"I think it's time to come home," she whispered and tenderly touched his cheek for a moment with her free hand.

He just nodded and they apparated together.

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_Reviews appreciated_


	2. Chapter 1

Here's the first Chapter :) Hope you like it!

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Thunder was rumbling in the distance and heavy raindrops drummed against the windows, dark clouds obscuring the sky.

Harry was sitting on the couch, his arms wrapped around his knees, and looked off into the distance, watching the lightening flashing across the dark skies. Behind him a fire was crackling merrily in their fireplace.

When Hermione entered the living room he looked around at her and she smiled, sitting down next to him.

"What are you up to today?"

He looked at her face and saw, with a pang of guilt in his guts, that she looked worried again. She always did when she was around him and he felt so bad for it. She shouldn't have to worry so much and he knew that she cried when he, once again, locked himself up in his room for days on end.

"Nothing," he sighed, "but, Hermione ... Stop looking so worried, please. I am alright, really. I can't stand seeing you sad all the time because of me. You should be happy, what with being pregnant and all!"

She smiled reassuringly and rested a hand on his arm, rubbing it gently.

"I am happy, Harry, but you're my best friend and it's hard for me to see you in such a state."

Harry placed his hand on top of her's and sighed again, looking away from her.

"If I continue to cause you so much worry, Ron is going to kick me out of the house one of this days."

"Don't be silly! You know that he would never do that. Ron knows that I am alright and he worries about you as much as I do. We just want to see you happy again."

He turned around and stretched out his legs, still looking away from her.

"I really should get my own place... That would be so much healthier for all of us. Once the baby is here there won't be enough room for all of us anyways."

Hermione suddenly got to her feet, hands on her hips and frowned down at him.

"Harry James Potter, stop being so thick! You don't really think it would help matters if you moved out, do you!? I would only be worried even more because I wouldn't know if you're alright or not..."

She sighed and bit down on her lip, her eyes brimming with tears.

"We want to help you, but you have to let us in and not shut us out."

Harry stood up too and pulled Hermione into a hug.

"Stop crying. Please."

He rubbed her back and she sobbed into his jumper, cluthing the fabrics in her hands. It took a while until she calmed down and when she stepped away, she wiped at her eyes and gave Harry a weak smile.

"I completely forgot to tell you, Ginny will come over tonight and have dinnr with us. Maybe you can ask her if she could help you get a job? Working at the Ministry, she migh be able to help you out."

Ginny was always a touchy subject to him and Hermione knew it.

Ever since they weren't together anymore it was always quite difficult for him and Ginny to be around each other.

"You know how I feel about that, don't you?"

"Yes. But still, I think it would be a good idea to ask her for help. You know she's in contact with the National Quidditch Team quite often... Maybe you could play for them?"

She sounded so hopeful that Harry just couldn't refuse her her and cause her more worry and pain, so he nodded.

"Okay. I'll ask her about it."

...

He was in the kitchen with Hermione, helping her prepare the dinner. The rain was still pounding heavily against the windows and lightening flashed across the dark sky. Every time the thunder rumbled it sounded like the roof would come crashing down and Hermione flinched several times.

"God, I really love this house, but I always feel like it's going to be blown away in one of this storms."

Harry chuckled and Hermione smiled happily.

"The Burrow survived worse than such storms, so why should this house get blown away?"

"I dunno...", she shrugged and then laughed heartily, "Oh, do you remember how often the doors fell out of their hinges?"

"Yes, we shouldn't have allowed Arthur to do it the 'Muggle way'"

"Hello guys," Ginny's voice rang through the kitchen and Harry felt that familiar stab in the pit of his stomach like every other time she was around him.

"Hi Ginny! You're early, aren't you?"

Hermione walked over to her and they shared a swift hug. Ginny nodded and sat down at the kitchen table, drying her clothes with her wand.

"Yes. The weather, y'know? Didn't allow us to practice any longer and we decided to just quit it for today and go home."

She now put her wand aside and looked over at Harry who had dared to turn around and watch her. She tilted her head to one side and looked intently at him, lost in thought.

"You look tired and ill, Harry ... It gets worse every time I see you."

It wasn't meant as an offence, he knew that, she just told him what was on her mind and he knew she was right too. He didn't say anything, though, and turned back towards the kitchen counter, peeling potatoes.

After a while he felt someone approach him and looked sideways, looking down at Ginny. Slowly, she reached up with one hand and rested it on his cheek, tracing her fingertips along his jaw and down to his chin.

"You need a shave..." her voice was only a whisper and Harry's eyes darted away from her face, over to Hermione who stood a few feet away and was silently watching them.

Ginny's eyes never left his face and her hand was still resting on his chin, causing him a tickling sensation there.

"Where's the young man I fell in love with so many years ago?"

Harry sighed and slowly pushed her hand away, hoping that this gesture wouldn't hurt her feelings.

"Gone. He's long gone Ginny..."

He then turned around and left the kitchen, going straight to his bedroom where he locked the door behind himself.

Ginny never failed to show him how wrong his life was going. She always had the talent to show him all the mistakes he was making, even though she never meant it in a way to hurt him, she wanted to help.

Like all the others...

But in the end, it didn't matter. They just couldn't help him. He felt like no one could. Ever since the war had been over he had fallen into that deep, black hole and doubted he would ever see the light in his life again...

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_Reviews appreciated ..._


	3. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews :) Here's the new chapter, hope you like it!

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Sombody knocked on his door and Harry groaned, turning over in bed.

"Harry?"

Another knock.

"Harry! Open the door, please!"

He sighed and sat up when he realized it was Ginny who stood outside. A look to the clock told him that it was past 4pm and he wondered why she wasn't at work. When another knock interrupted his train of thought he rubbed his eyes and got to his feet.

"It's alright, stop knocking! I am coming!"

Harry heard her giggle in a girlish way and rolled his eyes when he pulled open the door.

"What a familiar sentence to hear," she said with a broad grin, "Although I never was the one who came knocking."

She now gave him the kind of smile that used to make his heart skip a beat and he couldn't help, but blush at the memory.

"Right," he muttered and want to sit down on his bed again.

Ginny hesitated for a moment, leaning against the doorfram, but then seemed to make up her mind and strode into the room, over to the window to pull the curtains aside.

"It's such a nice day, don't shut the sun out, Harry. You need some daylight."

She brushed her hair back carelessly and then examined him with her knowing eyes. A sigh left her lips and she walked over to him, placing both her hands on his shoulders.

"I know we're long over, but I still care for you..."

He looked into her eyes and nodded, "I know, Gin."

Suddenly, she leaned in and breathed a soft kiss on his lips, before taking her hands off his shoulders and straightening up again.

Harry was baffled for a moment; Hermione had told him a couple of times that Ginny still had feelings for him, but he hadn't been sure if she were right.

"I want you to come with me to the ball at the Ministry tomorrow."

"I am not sure..."

He really wasn't now that he suspected that Ginny still loved him. It would do no good if she thought there was a chance of them becoming a thing again.

She pouted, "Please Harry. You have to get out for a while and I promise that it's gonna be fun."

"Okay..."

Not exactly sure why he agreed to come along, he nodded. Maybe the reason was that Ginny's lips on his still felt so incredible.

...

The black dress she was wearing hugged her body in all the right places and he couldn't help but gape at Ginny when she came closer, her hair dancing around when she moved.

"Hi Harry," a smirk played around her lips and she reached up, running her fingers through his hair and destroying what he had managed to achieve in hours of combing.

"It's nicer when it's unkempt," she stated when he frowned at her.

When she stepped away again, she looked him up and down, nodded her head once and Harry thought he saw her blush.

"You look good. Really."

He snorted and rolled his eyes, "Don't lie to me. I know that I still look hideous."

Ginny shook her head and grabbed his hand, leading him to the door.

"No. You really look fine tonight. I just hope that I'll get to see you smile a bit too."

"Hm..." he just shrugged and followed her outside where a car was waiting for them.

The drove in silence for a while until Harry suddenly realized that he hadn't seen Ron and Hermione all day.

"Will Hermione and Ron be there as well?"

Ginny shook her head, absent mindedly playing with a strand of her long hair.

"No. They're at the Burrow, Mum invited them over."

"Oh... Okay."

_Great_, he thought, _I will have to be careful and don't do anything stupid._

Once they reached the Ministry and entered the Atrium, where the ball was held, he wished desperately to be back home.

"Gin... Why didn't you tell me that there would be so many people?!"

She raised an eyebrow and handed him a glass of firewhiskey from a tray that had just been carried past them by a waiter.

"I thought you would know that yourself?"

He took a gulp from his drink, feeling the liquid burn down his throat, "Well, I didn't."

Ginny just laughed at that and laced her fingers through his, walking over to a group of people they knew from Hogwarts. Among them were Luna Lovegood and Nevilly Longbottom, who both looked very excited when they spotted Harry.

"Hello Harry," Luna smiled at him and kissed his cheek, her wide blue eyes full with adoration.

"It is good to see you again. Haven't heard from you in quite a while."

Now Nevilled stepped over and clapped him on the shoulder, "Harry, mate! Good to see you! What have you been up to lately?"

He felt trapped. What was he supposed to tell them? That he was spending his life sulking at Ron and Hermione's house? Not working at all? Was that really what he should tell them? They would be so very disappointed to hear what had become of him...

_Great, famous Harry Potter fallen from grace._

Ginny squeezed his hand gently to keep him from talking and smiled at Luna and Neville.

"Harry sometimes helps me at work. He was also recently invited to the tryouts for the National Team."

"Really?!" Neville goggled at him.

"That would be awesome! We would finally win a match again!"

Harry forced a smile and nodded.

"Yeah... Would be nice to play again. I miss Quidditch a lot."

And so it happened that he got involved in a conversation about Quidditch while Luna and Ginny talked about the newest gossip.

...

A while later, they were dancing, surrounded by several other people.

Harry glanced around, looking for another familiar face, and then it suddenly hit him.

The white blond hair, the lean, tall figure and the fair skin.

"Is that Malfoy?" he whispered into Ginny's ear and spun around so she could see who he was talking about.

She nodded, "Yeah, that's him and his wife... At least I think they're married."

Harry frowned and watched the Slytherin, his eyes wandering over the woman in Malfoy's arms. She wasn't very tall, but really beautiful with her dark curly hair and fair skin, her curves swaying to the rhythm of the music.

Her eyes met his and hers were of a shocking, vibrant blue. She smiled, her red lips curving in a mocking way.

Ginny caught him looking at the other woman and clucked her tongue.

"You are here with me... Or do you, like all the others, think she's beautiful?"

She looked at him, her expression stern and Harry smiled at her.

"She is, but not as beautiful as you are."

Ginny chuckled and kissed his jaw before she leaned her head against his shoulder, moving closer.

He couldn't keep himself for glancig over at Malfoy from time to time and it happened ever so often that his wife caught Harry's eye, so it wasn't really that suprising when they came over towards Ginny and Harry.

"Well, well, well... look who we have here." Malfoy's sneer was less mocking than it had been back in their school days, but still sent a shiver of excitement down Harry's spine. He bowed his head in a silent greet and extended his hand towards the blond.

"Good evening Malfoy."

Ginny looked back and forth between them when Malfoy hesitated to shake hands for a moment, but then grabbed Harry's hand firmly and shook it.

"Potter," he too inclined his head slightly, a mocking grin playing around his lips.

Harry wasn't sure why or what it was, but something stirred inside him when the other man looked him in the eyes.

He shook his head, avoiding to look at Malfoy's face again and looked at the woman at his side.

"Who is this lovely lady, if I may ask?"

Malfoy glanced down at her and the grin that has lingered on his lips disappeared.

"My wife. Astoria."

Astoria gave Harry a polite smile and then stepped away from her husband.

"I think I will go and sit down a bit."

Malfoy just nodded and watched her disappear into the crowd.

When he looked back at Harry the mocking smile that was so familiar to him, was back and Harry waited for the blond to say something insulting.

"It became quiet around famous Harry Potter, why is that?"

Harry opened his mouth to say something, but Ginny was quicker.

"That's none of your business, Malfoy. Besides, Harry deserves some rest more than anybody, don't you think so?"

The blond smirked and pushed back a strand of hair that had fallen into his face and it was now that Harry noticed how long Malfoy's hair had become. He wore it in a loose ponytail and it went past his shoulders.

"Did I ask you or did I ask Potter?"

Ginny huffed and Harry took her hand, trying to make her keep calm.

"I decided that it was time for some rest. I have had enought trouble to last me a lifetime."

Malfoy raised an eyebrow, amusement glinting in his eyes.

"What a pity. I would've thought you would become an Auror, a Quidditch player at least... But since I never saw you at St. Mungos or read about you in the Prophet, I knew that you were neither of it."

"St. Mungos?" Harry couldn't hide the curious undertone in his voice and hoped that nobody had noticed it.

"Yes. I am a Healer there."

He looked around and Harry followed his gaze, spotting Astoria. Malfoy sighed.

"I'll have to go now."

He raised a hand and walked away. Harry watched him go, a strange longing feeling evolving in the pit of his stomach, but he tore his gaze away when Ginny cleared her throat.

"Can we go home?" she asked in a low voice and Harry wondered why she wanted to leave so suddenly but then saw her casting a dark look over at the Malfoy's.

Was she jealous?

He chuckled and she looked up at him again, "What?"

Harry shook his head and took her hand, leading her over to the fireplaces which would allow them to travel by Floo.

"Nothing," he kissed her forhead before he pulled her with him into the green flames.

When they reached the living room of Ron and Hermione's house, Harry smiled down at Ginny.

"It was a nice evening. Thanks for inviting me."

She touched his cheek gently and smiled too, "I am glad you enjoyed it. It's good to see you smile again."

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_reviews appreciated ... _


	4. Chapter 3

Thanks so much for the reviews! Here's the new chapter :)

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Ginny's lips trailed down his neck while her fingers tugged at the buttons of his shirt impatiently. Harry's hands were resting on her waist and he held her close, although guilt was already filling his guts.

"Ginny..."

She groaned in anticipation and looked up at him, her eyes glazed over from lust. He took a deep breath and tried to ignore the signals his body sent him, slowly shaking his head.

"I can't..." he whispered and pushed her carefully away.

"Y-You can't...? Why? What makes you hold back?"

She was breathing heavily and glared up at him, smoothing her dress with both her hands and waiting for his response.

He gave her none.

Ginny's eyes narrowed, "Is it because of Astoria? Is she so _beautiful_ that you can't get her off your mind?"

Harry frowned. She had got him wrong. It had nothing to do with Astoria, he simply didn't want to take advantage of her and get her hopes up again.

She suddenly grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him down, their faces only inches apart, her breath hot on his face.

"If it is because of her... Well, you can pretend you're with her, I don't care. I really don't care."

Harry sighed and took her hands away from his shirt, straightening up again.

"No, I won't pretend anything because it has nothing to do with her at all! I don't even know her so don't be silly Ginny," he sighed and stepped away from her, "I just don't want to use you."

With that he turned around and walked into his room, carefully locking the door behind himself.

He could hear her raging on in the hallway, but after a few minutes heard a faint '_pop_' and knew she'd disapparated.

How stupid of her to think it had something to do with an other woman! He couldn't care less about Astoria, really. After all, he didn't know her.

It was more like ... The reason why he couldn't focus on Ginny wasn't a woman. He just _couldn't_ bring himself to wipe Malfoy from his memory again. Seeing the blond again had upset him in a strange way... Looking into those storm grey eyes...

Harry groaned and hid his face behind his hands. This had to stop immediately!

"Damn it..."

He kicked off his shoes, undressed and hid under his blanket, desperately trying not to think of the other man. It eventually worked, but as soon as he drifted off into sleep, his dreams were filled with the person he just wanted to forget.

...

"Harry James Potter! Wake _up_!"

Hermione seized his arm and almost pulled him out of bed. Harry growled and pushed her hand away, looking up at her, completely puzzled.

"Where's the fire?"

She huffed and crossed her arms in front of her chest, glaring down at him.

"Ginny was crying when she came to the Burrow last night. What happened and who is Astoria?!"

Harry sighed, rubbed his face and sat up.

"Listen Hermione, it's not my fault she was crying. I simply told her that I wouldn't take advantage of her. I don't want her to think that we'll come back together."

"Oh," the stern look left her face and she touched his arm gently, "Sorry... I thought that you two had a fight."

"No," he shook his head and made to get out of the bed.

"Uh, Harry?"

He sat back down again and looked at Hermione.

"Ron told me to send you to the Ministry as soon as you get up. He said he's got a job for you. Didn't tell me what exactly it is, just that it's at St. Mungos."

A jolt of excitement shot through his body when Hermione mentioned St. Mungos and he quickly got to his feet.

"Okay. I'll get ready and go there."

...

A short while later he reached Ron's office at the Ministry.

"Hey mate!" Ron grinned and Harry sat down opposite from him, watching his friend curious.

"Hi, so... what's the job you got for me?"

Ron sighed and picked up one of the many letters that lay strewn across his desk, looking down at it.

"St. Mungos needs our help. Many prisoners from Azkaban suffer from a strong form of dragon pox. They will be brought to the hospital today. As a security measure, Dementors will be stationed there ... I really don't get why, though. They only use them at the entrances to Azkaban anymore. I don't think the prisoners are capable to flee in the state they're in."

Harry raised an eyebrow, not sure what he was supposed to do, "Come to the point, Ron."

"Well, the Healers there will need some protection. Strong Patronuses, to be clear. Not all of them are capable to conjure one so that's why we need you."

"Isn't there someone in this Departement who could do the job?"

"No," Ron shook his head, "nobody wants the job. Besides, there's more important stuff for them to do. I thought you would like to get out of the house for a bit. You'll also be paid, so where's the problem?"

Harry shrugged, "There's no problem. But, as you very well know, I didn't conjure a Patronus in quite a while. I am not sure if I still can do it."

Ron snorted and shook his head.

"Don't be thick, Harry. You were able to conjure one when you were only thirteen! Don't underestimate yourself all the time. You have to get out and do something. You can't hide forever."

"I am not hiding!"

"Yes you are!" Ron's ears were reddening and that was never a good sign.

Harry, however, felt anger rise inside him too.

"It's because you want me to move out, isn't it?! I never asked to live with you and Hermione! It was your idea and now you want to get rid of me, don't you!?"

Ron stared at him, obviously dumbfounded and then shook his head again.

"Don't be an idiot. I don't want to get rid of you! I just want you to become your old self again! You changed ever since the war is over. You're not the Harry I, well all of us, used to know!"

"You want to blame me for that? For showing that it affected me?"

"No," Ron shook his head again, "I don't want to blame you for anything. But, after three years, it's time to carry on."

Harry didn't know what to say and just avoided to look at Ron. His friend was right, he knew that... but everything seemed just dark and dull in his life.

"Will you do it?"

Harry started and looked at Ron again, "What?"

"The job! Will you do it?"

He hesitated for a moment, but then decided that it was worth a try and nodded, "Yeah."

"Good. You can go there right away. They're already waiting for you."

Harry nodded and got to his feet to leave the room, but when he reached the door, Ron called him back.

"Hey, fancy to go for a drink after work?"

"Uh ... Sure."

Ron beamed at him.

"Alright, I will pick you up then!"

...

"Finally!" A cold, drawling voice sounded towards him and Harry spun around, his heart beating frantically.

There, a few feet away from him, stood Malfoy. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest and looked very impatient. Harry couldn't help but stare at the other man for a moment, captivated by his appearance.

Malfoy frowned, "Do I have something in my face?"

Harry blushed and quickly looked down at his feet, shaking his head.

"No. Sorry."

_Sorry_? Why did he even apologize!? To Malfoy of all people!

The former Slytherin waved his hand dismissively and walked towards Harry.

"However. Come on, I'll need your help right away. Those Dementor won't let me near my father... Looks like they fear that I might help him to get away," he snorted, "as if I would want _that_."

Harry just nodded and drew his wand, muttering the incantation. The Patronus he conjured wasn't as impressive as they used to be, but it would do it's job. Malfoy stopped in his tracks and turned around to look at the silvery-blue stag, a pained look flickering over his face for the tiniest moment.

"Well. Follow me, Potter."

Harry walked down the hallway next to the blond, his Patronus pacing in front of them. Soon he could feel the familiar chill the Dementors cause when a person came near them and as soon as he saw the first of the creatures, his Patronus started to flicker.

Malfoy stopped again and looked at Harry, one eyebrow raised.

"Are you sure you're up for that job?"

His voice was heavy with doubt and Harry pulled himself together, nodding.

"Yes."

They continued their way and the Dementors shied away from the Patronus until Malfoy stopped in front of a door and unlocked it. Harry was about to step inside, when Malfoy grabbed his arm and pulled him back, almost pulling him off his feet.

"Are you mental!? Dragon Pox are highly contagious!"

The blond drew his wand and flicked it and Harry felt a peculiar sensation spreading across his skin.

"Now you can go inside."

Harry walked through the door, followed by Malfoy. It was almost completely dark in the room apart from the light of a single candle and the faint glow his Patronus produced.

"Why is it so dark?" he whispered, as Malfoy was still standing next to him.

"They want to keep them as uncomfortable as possible while they're here. After all, they're still prisoners. That's why we have to keep the rooms dark."

But there was suddenly light in the room and Harry blinked, taken aback.

Malfoy sneered, "I am just glad we're allowed to turn on the lights while we're in here."

He then walked over to the only occupied bed in the room and Harry watched, feeling slightly uneasy.

"Draco, my son, how are you?"

Draco looked down at his father, but said nothing. Harry watched as he filled potion into a cup and handed it to Lucius. The older man's face had a greenish tinge, but that wasn't what made him look sick in the first place. His cheeks were hollow and his eyes had dark circles beneath them. The once long, blond hair looked dirty and unkempt and Harry realized that Lucius Malfoy looked old and haunted, reminding him of the way Sirius had looked like when he had first met him.

"I am done."

He jumped when he heard Malfoy's voice close to his ear.

"Oh. Okay."

They left the room again and Harry could see how the lights went out before the door had closed. He looked sideways at Malfoy, wondering how he felt when saw his father.

"He's pathetic..." Malfoy sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "the idiot had been pardoned and then decided to go and sell all the fishy stuff he had been hiding in our cellar."

He turned to look at Harry, "Will you help me prepare some more of the healing potion that I'll need?"

That question came out of the blue and Harry's Patronus almost vanished, but he quickly focused on it again.

"I- Ah- Well ... I am not sure. Ron said I am here because of the Dementors...?"

Malfoy rolled his eyes, "Potter, I just asked because it would be finished quicker if I don't have to do it alone."

Harry shrugged, "Okay."

He followed the blond and when they entered his office, Malfoy locked the door behind himself and walked over to where he had his cauldron set up.

"You can cut the ingredients..." the blond murmured and laid them down in front of Harry.

Harry grinned, "But don't sue me if it's a useless potion once it's done."

The blond smirked at him, "I won't."

He then sat down opposite from Harry and lit a fire under the cauldron filling it with water.

"Potter?"

Harry looked up again, almost cutting his finger, "Yeah?"

"Can I tell you something?"

There was something in Malfoy's voice that Harry had never heard before, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it.

"Sure. Go on."

* * *

_reviews appreciated ..._


	5. Chapter 4

Sorry for the long wait! Have been busy at work. Here's the new chapter and I hope you like it!

* * *

He continued to cut the ingredients for the potion while he waited for Malfoy to talk. All the while he felt that the blond was watching him and he was getting nervous, not knowing what the other man would tell him. After a few more minutes, Malfoy took a deep breath and Harry knew that he was about to talk now.

"Since Voldemort was destroyed, I wondered what did become of you. I never heard what you were up to... I eventually stopped to ask myself the same questions over and over again and since I heard Ginevra talk about you from time to time, I knew that you must be okay."

He paused for a moment and Harry tried his best to seem unaffected by his words, but his hand was shaking and so was the knife he was holding.

"But when I saw you at the Ministry, I was ... surprised. You seem really less like a hero than you ever did. It was shocking to be honest. You look old and restless. What happened to you?"

Harry flinched when he cut his finger and saw the blood seep from the wound. Just when he was about to stick his finger into his mouth to stop the bleeding, Malfoy was at his side and grabbed his wrist.

"Don't. The leaves you were just cutting are poisonous."

"Great!" Harry wasn't able to hide the panic in his voice and felt foolishly.

Malfoy slowly let go of his hand, making sure that Harry wouldn't do something stupid and walked over to a cupboard.

"Don't panic, I have the andidote here..."

He came back to Harry, a small flask in his hand and handed it over to him.

"Two drops of it onto the cut and you'll be alright."

Harry nodded and did as he was instructed. The cut began to smolder slightly and a weird smell filled the air.

"It stinks."

Malfoy smirked, "You stink, Potter."

Harry wanted to give a retort, but Malfoy held up his hand to silence him.

"Answer my question Potter. What happened to you?"

The Gryffindor sighed and looked at the opposite wall, not wanting Malfoy to look him into the eyes.

"Nothing happened to me. Why is everybody always asking that? Why does everybody suppose that I live my life like nothing ever happened? How can they think that I forgot all the people that died during that war... The ones who died for me?" his voice died at the end and he drooped his head.

"That's no reason to give up your life now. _Because_ all of them died. That's the best reason to carry on and do the best of what's left."

Harry looked up at the blond, surprised to hear such words from him. Malfoy looked back at him, his grey eyes burning with rage about Harry's behaviour.

"Really Potter ... Stop pitying yourself, that's pathetic. I mean, look at me!" he unfolded his arms to emphasize his words, "I should be the one to sit at home and do nothing. Everytime I go outside people look at me and I just know what they're thinking. I know that they think I am worth less than the dirt on their shoes. I am nothing to them. Nothing."

His intense gaze left Harry breathless for a moment.

"You have a wife..."

Malfoy rolled his eyes and then turned away from Harry.

"Because it was arranged for me to marry her."

He looked at Harry over his shoulder, a sad smile playing around his lips, "And still, I don't feel pity for myself because of it. I do the best with what I've got."

Harry honestly admired the blond for his words. It seemed as if Draco had found the strenght he himself had lost so long ago.

_Draco_... Harry smiled to himself, thinking the name and turned back to cut the remaining ingredients.

They worked in silence for a while, only talking when Draco told Harry what he needed next. But all the while, Harry had to think about what the blond had told him about Astoria.

"Aren't you happy with her?" he asked the question before he had really thought about it and Draco looked up at him, puzzled.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Aren't you happy with Astoria?"

Draco looked away from him again, stirring the potion. He seemed to ponder on his answer for a moment.

"No. I don't love her, how am I supposed to be happy?"

His face wore a grim expression and he sighed.

"She's pregnant."

Harry nearly cut his finger again, but pulled his hand away quick enough, dropping the knife instead.

"Is that a bad thing? I mean... Err... When she's pregnant that means that the two of you... Well... you know," he felt the heat creep up into his cheeks and quickly dived under the table to pick up the knife and hide his face.

"Well, we're supposed to have a child, but I am not entirely sure if it's mine."

Harry felt at a loss for words and just shrugged. What was he supposed to say to that?

Draco seemed to realize that and waved his hand dismissively.

"It's okay. We don't have to talk about that... You can go home as soon as the potion is finished, I won't need you again today."

Harry nodded, "Okay. What about tomorrow?"

"We start at 8am."

Draco smirked, "I start earlier, but it's fine when you're here at eight."

...

Harry eyed Ron suspiciously. His friend was behaving weird.

Once Ron had picked him up after work, they had went to the Leaky Cauldron for a drink.

"Spit it out Ron. Tell me what you want to say."

Ron sighed and sipped at his drink, pulling a face.

"I am embarrassed."

Harry just looked at him without saying more. Either Ron would tell him or he would not.

Finally, he took a deep breath and in the next second the words were literally spilling out of his mouth, "I want to marry Hermione."

Harry chocked on his drink and stared wide-eyed at Ron.

"What? Marry her? _Now_?"

Ron shrugged, "Why not?"

"Dunno..."

"She's pregnant Harry! There won't be a better time than now."

"If you say so," he took a big gulp of his Firewhiskey, not sure what to think about the whole thing.

"Yeah I do," Ron nodded, "Besides, I think you should go and see Ginny. She was very unhappy yesterday."

"She should be happy and not unhappy! I won't use her and I told her so, where's the problem with that?"

Ron sighed, "Mate, she's still in love with you. That's why."

"I'll go to her tomorrow after work. I can't wait to come home today, I am tired."

He emptied his glass and got to his feet, preparing to leave. Ron mirrored him and they left together.

When they entered the house, Hermione was already waiting for them and kissed Harry on the cheek once she had greeted Ron with a proper kiss. She then looked at Harry expectantly and he knew what she wanted to hear.

"Yeah. I had a good day."

Ron frowned, "What? Really? I thought that you had to work with Malfoy? How could that possibly be a good day?"

Harry raised an eyebrow and looked at Ron, "Well, he saved my life today because I nearly poisoned myself."

"How?" Hermione sounded slightly nervous and he sighed.

"I was cutting some leaves for a potion when I cut my finger. They were poisenous and I wanted to put my finger in my mouth... He told me that I shouldn't do that and gave me an antidote."

He held up his finger to show her where he had cut himself, "Look."

And she did look, but her eyes became wide and he himself felt kinda uneasy when he saw the wound on his finger.

"Looks like you have an allergic reaction," Ron stated dryly and went to the kitchen.

"Well," Harry shrugged, "He'll have to look at it tomorrow again."

Hermione grabbed his hand and examined at his finger from all angles, her brows furrowed.

"Are you sure that you don't want me to have a look and find out what it is?"

"Yes," Harry freed his hand of her grip and followed Ron to the kitchen, realizing that he had not eaten the whole day.

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_reviews appreciated..._


	6. Chapter 5

Here's the new chapter! Thanks for all the reviews so far :)

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Harry woke up early with a dull pain in his left hand and groaned. It was still dark outside and a quick Tempus charm showed him that it was only 6am. He sat up and switched on the light on his nightstand, looking down at his hand which looked _revolting_.

The skin had a greenish-grey tinge and his whole hand looked at least twice its usual size.

"Damn it..."

He got up and thought for a moment about waking Hermione, but then remembered that Draco had told him that he would be at the Hospital long before 8am. Maybe he was already there? Even though he wasn't sure if Draco would be there that early, he started to dress. Cursing several times while zipping up his jeans, he finally managed to get dressed and headed downstair. There he wrote a short note for Ron and Hermione and pinned it to the kitchen door before he left the house.

...

"Good morning, Mr Potter!" the cleaning woman beamed at him and Harry momentarily wondered how she had been able to recognize him. He had been rushing past her so quickly he was sure all she had been able to see was a blur.

He skidded to a halt, nodded at her and muttered a quick, "Morning," before he turned around the corner and down the corridor where Draco's office was.

Harry knocked twice, hoping that the blond was already there, but nobody answered and he cursed under his breath. Panting heavily, he leaned his forehead against the cool wooden surface of the door and closed his eyes.

In the next moment he nearly fell to the floor.

"Woah," not a second too late, he managed to grab the doorframe and found himself nose to nose with Draco.

The other man's eyes widened in suprise and he blushed, breathing a weak, "Hello."

He then stepped aside to let Harry in and closed the door behind himself.

"My hand," without any preamble, Harry held up his hand, showing it to Draco who let out a sound of surprise.

"What did you do?"

Harry frowned, "Nothing? Well, nothing except for cutting it yesterday."

"You sure?"

Harry nodded hastily, inwardly screaming at the blond to do something.

Draco nodded too, scratching his chin, obviously thinking.

"Okay, come over here," he led Harry over to the cupboards that lined one wall of the office and started to rummage around.

"We will try out this salve, since I think it's just an allergic reaction to the antidote."

"Ron said it might be something like that."

Draco looked up at him, a hint of the familiar sneer on his face, "Did he?"

He pushed Harry down on one of the chairs and sat on top of the table, grabbing Harry's hand.

The blond spread the salve all over Harry's hand and it felt peculiar, almost as if they had been friends for a long time, but there was something else too...

"Done," Draco grinned and hopped off the table again.

Harry watched him walk around the desk where he sat down and started to shuffle around some papers.

"Shall I go home again?"

Draco looked up, one eyebrow raised, "No, why?"

Harry just shrugged and tried to hide his relief that the blond didn't want him to leave. He didn't know why, but it felt nice to be around the blond.

...

Harry was walking down one of the long hallways, his Patronus striding in front of him, but he felt the cold creep up his back and shivered. The Dementors were hovering around him, waiting to strike. Goose bumps covered his arms and he shivered again. His Patronus was fading more and more with every step he took and the dark-hooded figures were closing in on him.

Harry knew that it would have been better to turn around and go back to Draco's office, but the blond had asked him to fetch something for him and he was determined to reach that stupid room and get what Draco needed.

It couldn't be too far anymore...

He took a deep breath, feeling the cold that surrounded him fill his lungs and with one last and feeble flickering, his Patronus vanished.

Instantly the Dementors swooped towards him and in the next moment everything went black.

...

(Draco's PoV)

"What have you done to him?!" Grangers voice was high-pitched and she looked ready to faint.

Draco gave her a nasty look and ran a hand through his hair when he looked down at the unconscious Harry.

"_I _did nothing. Maybe you haven't noticed, but there are quite a few Dementors around."

Suddenly Weasley burst into the room, rushed towards Draco and grabbed the collar of his robes.

"You ugly, little git! He's around you for a few hours and now look at him!"

The blond pushed the other's hands away and narrowed his eyes.

"You two idiots! I did _nothing_. Got it?! _NOTHING_!"

He shook his head and turned back towards the bed, feeling Harry's forehead.

"I am glad that I found him..."

"You shouldn't have let him walk around on his own..." Granger muttered and sat down next to Harry's bed, taking his hand in both of hers.

"You know the state he's in."

Draco sighed, "I wouldn't have thought that they affect him that much. I mean... He fought off so many of them in third year."

The young woman shook her head and tenderly pushed a few hair out of Harry's pale face.

"That was long ago... I'm surprised that he was able to conjure a Patronus at all."

Weasley still stood in the middle of the room and glared at Draco who now looked at him.

"What's your problem? I found him, he'll be alright."

The red haired man snorted, "He would be alright if you wouldn't be around at all. That's my problem."

Draco felt honestly hurt by that words and unfolded his arms in a helpless way.

"How can you blame me for what happened because of the Dementors?! How can that be_ my_ fault?"

"Because you're an unbearable git."

Granger looked over at her boyfriend and sighed, "Let's go Ron. We can't do anything for him now. He'll need to rest."

She got to her feet and walked over to the door, but Weasley wouldn't move a single inch.

"I won't leave Harry here with _him_."

He glared at Draco who opened his mouth to tell him that he should better shut up, but Granger was quicker.

"Come _on_ Ron. We're leaving. Malfoy is a Healer, he'll be around him, we can't help that now."

Once they had left, Draco walked out of the room as well and looked for one of his assistants.

"Hey, Parker!" he called out and the young man turned around, looking startled.

"Yes Mr Malfoy?"

"I want Mr Potter to be moved to my house. I will look after him until he's alright again. Will not be around in the next days, I guess."

Parker's eyes widened, "But sir! You can't stay away! We need you here, you know that."

Draco waved his hand dismissively and already turned to walk to his office and fetch his things.

"You'll be alright even without me around. There are much bettere Healers than I am. Now, please move Mr. Potter to my house. I'll await you there."

The young man finally nodded and stumbled down the hallway towards the room were Harry was.

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_reviews appreciated ... _


	7. Chapter 6

I am really glad you seem to like the story so much! Thanks again for the reviews :) Hope you like this new chapter as well!

* * *

Harry stirred and turned around, snuggling closer into the warm duvet he was wrapped in and inhaled deeply. The pillow smelled so delicious. Somehow with a hint of cinnamon...

_Cinnamon_? His pillow never smelled of cinnamon...!?

He opened his eyes, craning his neck to look around in the room and was shocked to realize that he had no idea where he was. Then he heard a soft snore at his right, his head swivelled around and he spotted Draco Malfoy curled up in a high backed armchair, fast asleep.

"Draco...?"

It was only a whisper, but the blond's eyes fluttered open and he blinked sleepily at Harry, stiffling a yawn.

"Oh, you're finally awake. How do you feel?"

"Alright... but, what are you doing here?"

Draco raised an eyebrow, a smile tucking at the corners of his mouth, "I live here, Potter."

Harry frowned and looked around again.

"You live here? Alone?"

The other man nodded, shifting around in the chair and not bothering to stiffle his yawns anymore while he pulled the thin blanket closer around his body.

"What about Astoria?"

Draco's eyes narrowed and Harry was afraid he had said something wrong. The blond shrugged.

"Astoria isn't here. She stays at our flat in London."

"Ah," Harry nodded, sat up and looked over to the tall windows. Snow was falling heavily outside, obscuring his view, but with a pang of realization he knew where they were.

"We are...!"

He straightened further up and stared at Draco before his gaze shot back to the window again, a comforting warmth spreading in his chest.

Draco nodded, "Hogsmeade, yeah. You can see the castle from here... or you would if it wasn't snowing so much."

Harry was speechless. He was back... Finally, after over three years he was back... and even after all that has happened it felt like coming home.

"Thank you," he didn't bother to hide his emotion when he felt a tear running down his cheek, but beamed at Draco.

"What for?"

Draco tilted his head, his expression curious and Harry looked out of the window again, wiping his eyes.

"For bringing me home."

...

Harry was sitting at the table in the small kitchen downstairs, watching Draco preparing breakfast.

"Uh... May I ask you something?"

Draco just nodded without looking at Harry.

"Does Astoria know? ...I mean, does she know that I am here?"

"No," he shook his head and turned around, placing a plate with scrambled eggs and bacon in front of Harry, "Eat."

Harry grabbed his fork, but still looked at the other man.

"Won't she come looking for you?"

Again, Draco shook his head and sat down opposite from Harry who lowered his look down to his food and started to eat.

It was silent in the kitchen until Draco broke the silence, his voice sounding defiant.

"She knows not to come here. She wouldn't come here to check what I am doing."

That sounded a bit fishy to Harry, but he just nodded and kept eating, silently appreciating how good Draco was at cooking, even though it was something as simple as scrambled eggs.

Once his plate was empty, Draco got to his feet again and looked down at Harry, "Would you like something else? Pancakes, maybe?"

"Oh... No. No, thanks!" Harry shook his head and leaned back in his chair, patting his belly, grinning.

"Don't you have to go to work, though?"

"I took some days off to look after you. Can't leave you alone, can I?"

Now that Draco mentioned it, Harry realized that he had no idea what had happened after he had become unconscious.

"What happened, anyways?"

The blond smirked, "I thought you wouldn't ask."

Draco sat back down again and just looked at Harry before he started to explain, "Don't you remeber that the Dementors attacked you?"

Harry rolled his eyes, "I do remember _that_, but not what happened after that."

"Well, nothing much, really. I went looking for you and luckily found you before something bad could've happened. Then I sent a message to Granger and she came over with the weasel."

Harry gaped at him, "What!? They were there!?"

"Yeah, but just to blame me for what happened, you know."

Harry ignored that for the moment, upset that his friends had been at the hospital without him knowing about it.

"So, why am I here now?"

Grey eyes met his and he had the sudden impression that Draco was thinking about how to best answer that question.

He finally sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "I wanted to look after you to make sure you would be okay again, but that would've been difficult with your friends bursting into the room at random just to insult me."

"But... why?"

Draco shrugged, "Maybe because I want to make up for what I did?"

The words had rushed out of Draco's mouth and Harry had a hard time to understand him.

Harry shook his head and sighed.

"Listen, there's no need to make up for anything. It's all over, just don't think about it anymore."

The blond sneered, "Look who is talking."

Harry bit back his retort and they sat in silence for a while, avoiding to look at each other.

He looked around for something to do and when his eyes found the window, he knew what he wanted to do.

"Can we go out for a walk? I haven't been here in ages."

Draco looked at him, a deep frown on his face, "You shouldn't go outside, but rest a bit longer."

Harry rolled his eyes, "Listen, I will need clothes and if you want me to stay here we will have to buy some unless you want to go to Ron's house and fetch some for me. And I _really_ would like to go outside a bit."

The knowledge of being so close to Hogwarts had sparked a light inside of Harry and he really felt like going out and see some people. He had stayed away from the public for so long... Too long.

"Fine."

It didn't sound like it was really fine, but Draco got to his feet anyways and led Harry back to the bedroom. Harry was on his heels, grinning broadly and then slid past Draco into the bedroom to fetch his shoes.

The blond shook his head and walked over to the wardrobe, looking at several cloaks. He then turned around with a heavy, black and expensive looking cloak and handed it over to Harry.

"You'll need this, it's cold outside."

Harry put it on wordlessly and then smiled awkwardly at Draco, "It's a bit tight."

Draco raised an eyebrow, "Well, yeah, you have broader shoulders than I. Shall I look for another one? But I doubt that any of them will fit you."

"I am really terribly sorry Mr Malfoy."

"Oh shut up, Potter."

Draco turned on his heels and walked out of the room. Harry quickly followed him and slipped into his trainers on the way to the door.

The blond looked at him before opening the door, "Are you sure that you feel fit enough to go outside? I won't be able to carry you back here and up the stairs if you decide to faint again."

"I will not faint, promise."

Draco shrugged, "On your risk, then."

Together they left the house and stepped out on to the snowy street. There were only a few other people around and, to Harry's great relief, they ignored them.

"You want to go looking for clothes first?"

Harry nodded and Draco led the way to a shop Harry had never visited before. As soon as they stepped inside, a young witch came over to them and beamed at Draco, "Welcome Mr Malfoy! It's always a pleasure to see you."

She now looked over at Harry and her eyes darted up to his scar for the tiniest moment, but she didn't say anything.

"We need some trousers and shirts or jumpers for my friend."

She smiled and nodded, "Alright, would you please follow me?" she turned to Harry, giving him a polite smile and he followed her.

Draco walked behind them and watched silently while the witch choose several clothes for Harry, piling them on his arms.

Harry sometimes looked down at the pricetags and instantly knew why he had never entered that shop before. The stuff they sold was expensive!

He turned around to look at Draco, his eyes wide and whispered, "That's too expensive."

The blond shook his head and waved his hand dismissively, "Don't worry. I'll lend you the money for now and you will just give it back once you're fully cured."

Harry opened his mouth to argue, but Draco gave him a warning look and he closed his mouth again.

When they went to pay, he would have very much liked it to refuse them all, but Draco was paying before he could say anything and forced the bags into his hands when they left the shop.

"Potter," Draco eyed him with a stern look, "You need some nice, proper clothes. I always only see you running around in Muggle clothing..."

They walked down the street for a few moments before Draco suddenly stopped and Harry caught him looking him up and down when he turned around.

"Besides, you look gorgeous in those pants, so stop complaining. Good clothes simply are expensive."

Harry felt the heat creep up into his cheeks and stuttered some incomprehensible words, before he decided to better shut up and take refuge in the Three Broomsticks.

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_reviews appreciated..._


	8. Chapter 7

Sorry for the long-ish wait! I had some troubles with my pet snake, but now it's all good again. Hope you like this chapter, although it's a bit 'depressing' at the end!

* * *

Safely curled up in Draco's bed, Harry enjoyed his peaceful slumber which was only interrupted by Draco who occassionally walked into the room. From time to time, Harry dared to throw a glance over at the blond and found him smiling fondly, obviously thinking that Harry couldn't see it.

The sky outside was obscured with pale clouds and snow was still falling, although not as heavily as before. Harry couldn't tear his gaze from the distant outlines of Hogwarts and his heart was aching to go there, but Draco had refused to do so for another couple of days.

For yet another time, Draco came into the room and looked over at Harry who looked back, grinning.

"Are you watching me in my sleep? Isn't that a bit creepy?"

The blond blushed and Harry's grin grew only wider. He still wasn't sure what exactly was going on, but something was happening between Draco and himself. He felt ridiculously comfortable around the other man and dreaded the day when he was allowed to go back home.

"No," the other man sniffed and turned around again in an attempt to leave the room.

"Stay," Harry called out and now blushed himself when Draco looked back at him with raised eyebrows.

Harry drooped his head and looked down at his hands, "Please. Stay..."

He heard Draco walk over to the bed and looked up again. A small smirk lingered on Draco's lips and he sat down on the bed.

"I was just checking on you because I was afraid that you were going to be sick again."

"Why would I?"

"Because you should've stayed inside. A Dementor attack isn't somthing you should take too easy."

Harry shrugged and found himself watching closely when Draco sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"You have really nice hair."

The words had left his mouth without him wanting to and he blushed furiously. Draco frowned and looked speechless for a moment.

"Potter, I am not a girl. Your charming flirt attempts do absolutely nothing to me."

For a moment Harry thought that Draco was angry, but then heard the distinct tone of amusement in his voice and grinned.

"What a shame... I thought I could somehow charm you."

Wide, grey eyes stared at him, "Don't make jokes about things like that."

Harry looked Draco straight in the eye, "I am not joking."

He wasn't entirely sure if he wasn't just imagening it, but he thought that Draco blushed a light pink shade.

"Oh just shut up Potter."

Draco got to his feet and walked over to the window, leaning against it's frame. Harry watched him, wondering what he had done wrong.

Both of them kept silent for several minutes that seemed endless to Harry and he opened his mouth a couple of times, but then decided against talking and shut it again.

No need to say that he was more then surprised when the blond suddenly turned around, came back to the bed with a few, long strides and cupped Harry's face between his hands.

Harry just stared at him, completely taken aback by the sudden movement and held his breath. Draco's eyes were unreadable and he leaned closer, his breath brushing over Harry's lips, causing him to shiver.

"You're an unbearable git, Potter... I tell you that."

Before Harry could make any sense of those words, Draco pressed his lips to Harry's, leaving him breathless. His hand found its way into Draco's silky hair, pulling the blond closer who responded with a low grunt. Harry had the feeling that his blod was boiling in his veins, he was overly aware of Draco's lips on his own while his other had slowly crept under Draco's shirt, caressing the soft skin.

The other's scent made his had spin and he gasped into Draco's mouth, his lungs screaming for oxygen. Draco moaned softly and took his chance to let his tongue slip into Harry's mouth.

Just when Harry was sure that their kiss would last forever and suffocate them, Draco pulled away, panting heavily. His eyes were glazed over and his gaze sent a shiver down Harry's spine.

Even though he still felt that burning desire in every fibre of his body, he cracked a grin, "So ... I am a git, yeah?"

The blond nodded, still seeming breathless. Meanwhile, Harry's thoughts drifted off and he wondered why he had no problem with kissing a bloke... That he, actually, had just kissed Draco Malfoy and, even more important, had enjoyed it thoroughly.

He absent-mindedly reached out and touched Draco's cheek. He was blushing and Harry admired the soft skin beneath his fingertips.

"What about Astoria?"

Draco looked at him, his grey eyes still showing a passionate glint, but he frowned.

"What do you mean?"

Harry looked back, dumbfounded, not sure how to express what was going through his mind. He had troubles to focus on one, clear thought because so many things were racing through his head.

"Well ... What will she say about this? ... Us?" he couldn't keep an uncertain undertone out of his voice and felt foolish for what he had just said. What was he talking? How could he even think that a single kiss meant anything and that there was something happening between them? It was still like it had been before. Like nothing had happened. People often kissed and never talked about it, right?

Right.

"Us? I don't think there's an 'us', Potter. This was just a kiss."

The word 'just' made Harry flinch involuntarily and he withdrew his hand from Draco's cheek. The happy bubble around him burst as quickly as it had come to live and he avoided to look at the other man.

"Right. You're right. I got carried away. Sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for," Draco whispered and got to his feet, "Just keep it to yourself. There's no need to bother others with it, okay?"

Harry nodded, "Sure."

Without another word, Draco left the room and closed the door behind himself. Harry let out a groan and hid under the heavy duvet.

He was so stupid! Just because they had kissed, he was thinking there were feelings involved" When had he fallen for Draco? Without even realizing it...?

Harry was thinking about that for a while, but didn't come to a conclusion and he eventually had to admit that his feelings wouldn't be returned. He didn't blame Draco... Not at all, but the black hole Harry was stuck in, just had become a bit deeper again.

With a feeling of hopelesness he drifted off into an uneasy sleep, overshadowed by weird, twisted dreams.

(Draco's PoV)

He walked down the stairs and into the back garden, stepping out into the piercing cold. He bit down on his lip and looked up into the sky, tears obscuring his vision.

He was such an idiot!

Why had he kissed Harry? Couldn't he just hold back? No, he had to give in to his feelings and screw everything up. He had hoped that they could be just friends and maybe, with time, Harry would've felt the same as Draco, but now... Now it was all over. He had seen that his words had hurt the other man, but maybe it was better after all. He probably wouldn't be what the other one deserved. Wasn't good enough, anyways.

He closed his eyes and drooped his head, his tears falling into the snow.

Yes, it was better like that. Once Harry was feeling good again, he would go back to his friends and Draco wouldn't bother him anymore.

It wouldn't have worked out, what with Astoria and all. Besides, it would've caused an uproar among the wizarding community to see Harry Potter involved with a former Death Eater.

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_reviews appreciated..._


	9. Chapter 8

Woops, I am productive today, haha. Hope you like this chapter too and that it's not too soppy or anything ;)

* * *

"Harry!"

He started violently and stirred, his eyelids still heavy from sleep. All he could see for a moment was a mass of red hair and a familiar scent filled his nose.

"Gin?" he whispered and carefully entagled himself from her embrace.

She smiled at him and nodded her head once before she wrapped his arms around him again.

"I am so glad that you woke up! I started to get really worried."

He frowned at her when she finally let go of him, wondering what she was talking about.

"No wonder I wake up when you call my name, but why would you be worried just because I am sleeping?"

The smile on her face faded quickly and she tenderly pushed some hair out of his face.

"You were having a nightmare and I had to try for quite a while to wake you up."

"Oh."

The door to the room opened and Harry watched Draco enter. The blond looked tired.

When he saw Harry, relief was written all over his face and he took a deep breath, "Ah, you're finally awake."

Something in the others voice made Harry's stomach clench and he quickly looked back at Ginny again.

"I still don't know why you're here, though."

Ginny sighed, her hand still resting at his temple.

"Draco called me to come over because you were sleeping for so lon-"

He interrupted her, "What? How long did I sleep?"

Draco now walked over to the bed and sat down in the armchair that stood next to it.

"About 30 hours. You had a high fever as well. I tried to wake you, but then thought it might be better to let you sleep for a while."

Harry shook his head in an attempt to sort his thoughts a bit, but it didn't work.

"Why did I sleep so long?"

The blond shrugged and their eyes met again for a short moment, "I guess it was an aftereffect of the Dementor attack, but you might just get a cold or your body handles stress that way."

Harry frowned deeply, unsure what had caused his long sleep. Probably he was really just getting sick...

Ginny smacked her lips and turned towards Draco, a sympathetic look on her face.

"Would you mind to leave us alone for a moment? I would like to talk to Harry about something."

"Sure," Draco nodded and got up to leave the room.

Once he was gone, Ginny turned back to Harry, her face suddenly wearing a reprimanding expression.

"What?!"

"You are an idiot."

Outraged, he just stared at her, unable to find words that would express his thoughts properly.

"Well, you are Harry. Can't you see the obvious?"

"Would you mind telling me what you're talking about?"

He tried to keep his voice calm and casual, but found it hard to keep his temper at bay. Besides, he had a terrible headache and was hungry, too.

"I am talking about _him_."

Harry raised an eyebrow, "Draco?"

"Yes! What's going on between you two? He looks terrible, like he hasn't slept in days."

Did she know? Did he possibly tell her about the kiss?

"I dunno what you mean Ginny."

She snorted, "Yeah you do!"

"Look, I don't know what he told you, but there's nothing going on between us."

"Ah, right. That's why he came to me, looking like hell and told me that he kissed you and that it was the worst thing he could've done, because it ruined everything."

Okay, that hurt. So their kiss was the worst thing Draco had ever done? Had he lied to Harry when he'd told him that Astoria didn't mean anything to him?

He looked away from Ginny and crossed his arms in front of his chest protectively.

"I am sorry that he bothered you with it, but rest assured, it's not gonna happen again."

"But that's the point!" she cried out and threw her arms up, looking exasperated.

"He likes you. A lot. I would go as far as saying that he loves you. I just think that he doesn't dare to tell you and that he's afraid that he's not good enough. It would cause a lot of trouble if he got involved with you, but he's willing to face it as long as you're too!"

His heart was beating so furiously, he was afraid it would break through his ribcage and he wasn't able to say anything to what he'd just heard, because it had turned his world upside down in the blink of an eye.

Ginny watched him wearily and slowly got to her feet.

"Talk to him about it. You need to sort that out and tell him if you want him or not... Just... Don't be too blunt, okay?"

It clearly was an advice to be less tactless than he had been when he had broken up with her and he nodded, his mouth too dry to say a word.

She stooped to kiss his forehead and then left the room.

Harry didn't move an inch, still trying to process what Ginny had told him.

Draco liked him. Draco Malfoy might even love him.

He had no idea what to make of that. He liked the blond too, very much indeed, but... would a relationship between them work out? Could they live together? He really didn't know.

A couple of minutes later the door opened again and Draco came in cautiously.

"May I?"

Harry nodded, "Sure. It's your place after all."

Draco walked over and sat down again, avoiding to look at Harry. An unfomfortable silence fell in the room and all Harry could hear was his own and Draco's breathing. It was unnerving and he wished the blond would say something, but he didn't.

"Draco..."

Harry looked at the others face, but the blond still wouldn't look at him, instead he examined an old ring he wore on his left hand.

"Listen Po- Harry ... You don't have to say anything. It was stupid of me to kiss you and I should've known better. I was just thinking that maybe, by some miracle, you felt the same as I do."

Harry waved his hand impatiently and Draco fell silent again.

"Stop this shit. I think I do feel the same. I am just- well, you know... It's a bit complicated. I've never considered being ... liking dudes."

For a moment, Draco just looked at him with wide eyes, his mouth slightly open and Harry waited for him to get a grip again.

"So... You- you think we could...?"

Harry shrugged.

"I honestly don't know. Like I said, I never considered being with a man."

Draco's face lit up with sheer happiness and Harry couldn't help but notice how much healthier it made him look.

"But you think we could try it? You liked the kiss?"

Heat was creeping up his neck and into his cheeks and Harry silently nodded.

"Yeah, I would like to try it."

With one swift move, Draco was next to him and pulled him into a tight embrace.

"I am so glad you don't hate me now. I've wanted you for years, but never had the guts to tell you and then ... things happened and I kinda gave up on you until now. I just-"

Harry chuckled and leaned back a bit to look up at the blond.

"It's okay Draco, we've got all the time we need now. Just," he ducked his head, blushing, "would you mind to kiss me again? Now?"

Draco laughed heartily and they shared a tender kiss that made Harry's heart flutter.

Who would've thought that Draco Malfoy of all people, was the one to make Harry happy again? That he was the one to help him out of this dark hole he had found himself in? Draco was the one who had the ability to light up his sky.

...

(Draco's PoV)

A vase soared past his head and shattered on the wall behind him.

"You complete arse Draco Malfoy! I will make life hell for you, I swear! Whatever I can do, I will! And I will destroy you in the way you destroyed me! Believe me this one thing only: You will regret that you screwed me up like this!"

She seized another vase and aimed at his head, but he drew his wand and shouted, "Protego!"

The shieldcharm made the vase shatter in mid-air and Astoria let out a scream of rage, seized various other objects and hauled them at him, but to no avail.

He didn't dare to use any other spells, afraid that he might hurt her and the baby, no matter if it was his or not.

Tears of anger were streaming down her face and she sank to her knees, hiding her face behind her hands.

"I am so sorry, Astoria, I wouldn't do this if there was a way around it."

"Oh! Just get out of here! I don't give a shit about what you would and wouldn't do!"

He nodded, grabbed his bag and left the flat.

A tight knot had formed in his stomach. Maybe he should've kept his realtionship with Harry a secret for a little longer. He had just wanted to prevent Astoria from walking in on them. Nobody else knew about it, but now it was only a matter of time until everyone knew. He was sure Astoria would go to the Prophet with this bit of gossip he just presented to her.

It wasn't like he was worried for his job or anything. He really couldn't care less about that. All he could think about was what it would mean to Harry. How it would affect him...

And now he had to go home and tell him about what he had done.

* * *

_reviews appreciated..._


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